Monty Python RPG: Fetchez la Vache! 3-in-1 Game Set (Preorder)

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"I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now, go away, or I shall taunt you a second time-a!"

Fetchez la Vache! 3-in-1 Game Set includes a custom-designed beechwood board, 2 dice catapults, 21 meeples (20 human, 1 bovine), 4 dice, 1 doubling cube, 30 checkers, and rules for THREE games.

 1. Fetchez la Vache! A madcap backgammon-based game that pits two teams against each other in a race to capture a cow and leave the field with it alive, all while dodging catapulted farm animals and scathing insults French taunts. (Note: this activity requires the Monty Python RPG: Cocurricular Mediaeval Reenactment Programme.)

 2. Squashez l'Anglaise! Flip the board over and let fly with this point-based, historically accurate, terribly violent castle-siege simulator.

 3. Backgammon! A fully functional backgammon board (for those who wish to appear smarter than people who play checkers but can't be arsed with chess).

Specifications and Components:

  • A custom-designed and illustrated birchwood game board.

  • Approximate board dimensions (open, L x W x H): 17.13 x 21.65 x 1.48 inches (43.5 x 55 x 3.75cm)

  • Approximate board dimensions (closed. L x W x H): 17.13 x 10.83 x 1.48 inches (43.5 x 27.5 x 3.75cm)

  • 21 printed wooden meeples of varying shapes and designs (knights, priests, retainers, and the like...plus the cow, of course).

  • 2 fully functional and highly dangerous to mice wooden dice catapults.

  • A pair of woefully under tested, wonderfully launchable dice.

  • A pair of cow bags for storage. Storage of game components. Not recommended for cows.

  • Oh and all the bits for backgammon, too: 15 black checkers, 15 white checkers, and 1 doubling cube

  • Castle wall divider for increased difficulty and more realistic farm animal trajectories.

Nota bene: Fetchez la Vache! is an integral part of the roleplaying game, but this particular game set is not required for gameplay. Any mundane backgammon board can be used.